Tuesday, March 22, 2005
trying to remember
how not to fight
I am here
living every day
as best as I can
falling in and out
of love with myself
how not to fight
I am here
living every day
as best as I can
falling in and out
of love with myself
i just forgot to wake up today
know what i mean?
forgot to live my life
and be myself
forgot to open my eyes
and see what i saw
so maybe i should just
go back to sleep
and try again tomorrow.
know what i mean?
forgot to live my life
and be myself
forgot to open my eyes
and see what i saw
so maybe i should just
go back to sleep
and try again tomorrow.
Monday, March 21, 2005
so this is what this feels like
I guess I thought I'd skip it, somehow
as if something in me is not
succeptible to this kind of pain
just because I love, does not mean
I must be loved in return
and this is what this feels like.
I guess I thought I'd skip it, somehow
as if something in me is not
succeptible to this kind of pain
just because I love, does not mean
I must be loved in return
and this is what this feels like.
Sunday, March 20, 2005
3/19 (incomplete)
this nothing that
I am right now
is all that I
will ever be
this nothing that
I am right now
is all that I
will ever be
3/20
quietly watching
as the walls
close in around me
too frozen and
disoriented to find
my way out
not even really
sure I remember
how I got inside
watching the last
sliver of light
disappear from
the floor
quietly watching
as the walls
close in around me
too frozen and
disoriented to find
my way out
not even really
sure I remember
how I got inside
watching the last
sliver of light
disappear from
the floor
Saturday, March 19, 2005
3/18
there's no way
time saw me standing
and fighting my will
biting my lip
and missing my chance
empty from the struggle
and hoping against hope
for some piece of life
to fill me back up
time didn't see me
there's no way it could
the face on the clock
has no eyes.
there's no way
time saw me standing
and fighting my will
biting my lip
and missing my chance
empty from the struggle
and hoping against hope
for some piece of life
to fill me back up
time didn't see me
there's no way it could
the face on the clock
has no eyes.
3/18
all these miles
down this road
closed up
shut inside
spinning tires
gasoline smells
yellow lines
all fighting for
the next chance
to exit
no one signals
or checks their blindspot
forgetting completely
to limit their speed
we are crashing
into each other
slamming on brakes
honking horns and
yelling names
never even
glancing over
to see that
we are raging
against ourselves
all these miles
down this road
closed up
shut inside
spinning tires
gasoline smells
yellow lines
all fighting for
the next chance
to exit
no one signals
or checks their blindspot
forgetting completely
to limit their speed
we are crashing
into each other
slamming on brakes
honking horns and
yelling names
never even
glancing over
to see that
we are raging
against ourselves
3/18
my blood is flowing freely
red like wine
from the tip of my pen
settling into the page
and at times
the tears i cry
drip thick and black
with ink
does that mean
i am drawing myself
onto this page
or could it be
the ink is drawing me?
my blood is flowing freely
red like wine
from the tip of my pen
settling into the page
and at times
the tears i cry
drip thick and black
with ink
does that mean
i am drawing myself
onto this page
or could it be
the ink is drawing me?
Friday, March 18, 2005
shrink back from the infinity
fall away and hide
where time is only a suggestion
and separate does not exist
not to see it all as pain
but pain to see it all
and then, when i am through
i will step back inside myself
and start again.
thanks, cheese, i love you!
fall away and hide
where time is only a suggestion
and separate does not exist
not to see it all as pain
but pain to see it all
and then, when i am through
i will step back inside myself
and start again.
thanks, cheese, i love you!
